Awkward Silences

I miss him. Terribly. And, well, PMS was NOT so awesome last night.

On the way to gym, I got into a emotional hyperventilating mode.

I cried when someone came out slow at the parking and the guy at the back got it.

I cried when someone followed me so close I couldn't park at this spot, and then, after I made a round, some Saga stole my spot RIGHT in front of me.

Well not literally cry. I went into a watery eyed situation because I didnt wanna cry over such a thing so I told myself not to cry.

I breathed deeply, I exhale, I stopped at the side of the road, and told myself to chill.

Gym wasn't as awesome either. 2 weeks - can't do 30 bicep curls in a shot, kept missing the dance steps.

Was quite disappointed with myself, in a way.

And then after that, I called him.

And he just kept silent on the phone.

So, I said: "Why're you keeping silent on the phone? I'm talking to you."

"Oh..erm..I know this excuse doesn't work..*silence* I'm studying."

Alright, fine, you wanna study go ahead. Don't let me ruin ur day.

It's NOT that I dont want him to study and all but, at least, he could have told me straight when I called him, that his mum called and threatened him if he doesn't score for his exams, its byebye to Tarc & A-levels.

Well if it was me, I'll say "Screw you ma. No one can force me to get an A if I JUST can't do it. It's like, trying to build a laptop from scratch when you dont know a thing about computers."

He should just focus on his studies this week. No need to bother about my feelings and sense of need. I want him to have a good life too.

I wish him the best of luck for everything.

ILY.

Dry throat, nauseousness, headache. Hopefully I'll get better by lunch.

xx